One Huge Warm Pacifier

There is nothing better in this world for me than nursing my kids.

Ask any momma, and she will tell you that it is a very time consuming, self-less but beautiful thing to do. Isaiah will be two in July. I don't see us parting ways anytime soon. And that is ok with me.

I use to think about all of the things that I had to get done while I was nursing. I could be using this time to wash that ever growing pile of laundry, or scrub the bathroom from top to bottom because let's face it, with four boys, I really should be scrubbing it three times a day, and I'm lucky to get to it once or twice a week. The to-do list is never ending and the constraints on my time are more noticeable now with a wide range of ages present. 

With these last two kiddos, I learned to enjoy and appreciate nursing. Those eyes that have no other recourse but to stare directly into mine is something that I will never take for granted. The way their little hands caress or grab onto my shirt like they never want to let go packs such a powerful punch it brings tears to my eyes. Of course it's probably just a reflex on their part if they feel me moving away, but still, it never fails to move me.

Now, I think of all the things that are happening right now. Like the eyelashes that slowly move up and down. An obvious indicator that sleep is just around the corner. To me it signifies the end of a morning that was spent playing and eating and laughing. Or the evening rituals of bathtime, lotioning little bodies, and tucking ourselves into the corner of the couch for some time together.  And those smiles. The crease in the corners of the mouth, smiling, but never allowing for his lips to break latch. That makes me smile just thinking about it.

As I was commenting to the pediatrician on how Isaiah still wakes at night to nurse, he kindly suggested that if I wanted to get a good night's rest, then I should stop nursing. His exact words were, "You are just one huge, warm pacifier to him."

So true.

Best Flour Tortillas Ever

My momma is one of the best cooks I know the best cook i know. How's that for butt kissing? Seriously, she gets down in the kitchen. So, when I had a hankering for homemade flour tortillas, the woman of the hour came through. Again. Let's just say the kitchen and I have a healthy respect for each other. She, the kitchen, promises not to burn me and the casa down and I promise to stay away as much as possible after cooking 3 simple meals a day.

My helper extraordinaire:

Do you see Aiden's little hands in the dough? For such a camera hog, he refused to take pictures that day. He told me he had 'crazy hair'. He wasn't kidding.

Just dawned on me that Isaiah has the same 'crazy hair'.

G-ma Bell, are you proud?

They were both so concentrated on making their tortillas, they amused themselves, as in alone and not calling for me, for 1/2 an hour, which made me: Winning! (Let's channel Charlie Sheen here.)

I ended up the loser though. Since I made these decadent 33 grams each of carbohydrate induced saucers, the spawn have since decided to boycott prepackaged flour tortillas for homemade flour tortillas. Major loser. 

Mom, if you're reading this - don't. Wait until Mother's Day.

I took pictures of these fabulous kids of mine. Just a little something for Mother's Day that is looming ahead. Do you know how hard it is to make sure 5 kids look at the camera at the same time? Without losing my sanity? Just saying.

As you can see, some of us did lose our sanity.

Oh my, how in love with these people am I. Makes it almost worth my loss of brain cells.



This boy has me wrapped around those grubby, chubby, little hands of his. I wouldn't have it any other way. At this very moment in time I write with him in my arms...nursing, drifting off to sleep.



We are fortunate to live a block away from some gorgeous vineyards. This old red barn was just asking to have its picture taken with my brood. Unfortunately you won't really get to see the vineyard as these kids refused to take pictures with the 'grapes'.

And just for the record, I brushed and tamed Aiden's hair. However I firmly believe it has a mind and life of its own.

My lovely girl.

Can I just take a moment to say how thankful I am to have this child as my daughter?  I am. She is the greatest.

There you have it. My best try. Mom, if you saw these pictures act surprised on Mother's Day, mmmkay?

Lovely Day Who Would Have Thought

There were some pretty gorgeous days last week. We could no longer stay away from the sun's warm rays of sunshine...or the nearest park.

Since the weather has had a mind of it's own for several weeks and add to that the fact that my children have been the earthly version of the plague, we haven't seen the park in many weeks.

I we missed it.

It worked out so wonderfully. Silly, really, how a trip to my not-so-favorite-park-I-only-go-there-when-I'm-short-on-time, turned into a trip my Aiden remembered in the morning.

Aiden and Isaiah are home with me all day long...so needless to say it gets a little mundane and repetitious. Our trips to the park help me stay sane and they love it. It's a win win baby.

The sun was shining through so beautifully.

You see my boys face? Pure joy I tell you.

Shredded tires are the bomb.

My favorite picture. Isaiah was playing too close to the edge and he kept laughing hysterically when I would yell for him to move back. He would actually kick his little foot in the open to make me leap forward. And then he would laugh maniacally. Punk.

Isn't this tree gorgeous? It is absolutely huge. My boys and I laid under it and watched the little blossoms sway to the floor.

Snack time. Holy cow...I actually brought one.

Sigh. I love these boys. I really love these boys.

Their favorite part of the day? Picking up their brother from school.

My favorite part of the day? The next morning, when Aiden told me he had a wonderful time at the park and could we lay under the tree again.

This week is going to be busy...I thrive on busy. I do my best work when there are deadlines involved. That's nice speak for I'm a damn procrastinator. However, everything seems to get done. Not perfectly but done. I'm still working on that pile of laundry. Ahem, piles of laundry.

Have a spectacular week. Go to the park. Give your babies a kiss. Tell them you love them.

Happy Birthday Aiden

Happy Birthday Baby

We celebrated his birthday this weekend. Simple, only his siblings, and he was very happy.

Aiden, my love, you are now 4 years old and the life of the family. Your independent streak has skyrocketed into something resembling the attitude of a 15 year old boy. Not fun...but then again, you are instantly forgiven with your sloppy kisses, hugs and I love you's. You love to say "Aaawwwkwarrrrd" which you say at just the right time every single time and that dissolves your siblings into fits of laughter. You are growing up though. I can see that you crave some alone time. I often find you in someone's room playing with Thomas the Train, or closing the door to you room. I know how that feels buddy. Isaiah follows your every move and repeats everything you say. He loves his "butter". He frustrates you because he wants everything you have...but just letting you know baby that that is just payback for Michael's frustration with you, and Manuel's frustration with Michael, and Alyssa's frustration with Manuel. You all did it to each other and it's funny to see the domino effect of sibling frustration. Seriously, honey you crack me up.

The water is your love. You love the hose and water bottles and water balloons and spray bottles and baths. You love picking up your brothers from school and are very excited about going to school in the fall with your brothers. I ask you who mommy's baby is and you answer without fail: I'm your big boy baby. You are. You are amazing and smart and handsome. You have a beautiful heart who loves his brothers and sister and is always willing to show it - whether they want you to or not. You are in that stage where you want to be my little boy and you want to follow your older brothers. This stage has brought you tears and bravado. A wonderful combination that shows your independence and the fact that you are still only 4 years old and a momma's boy. I can't tell you how much I love that.

Happy birthday love. Thank you for choosing me as your momma.